I hate Mondays.
It's Monday. Woo-fuckin'-hoo. Seems like all sorts of little things went wrong today - I forgot my keys, my radio didn't want to work, the kitchen lost my order at dinner, I got lost in the building a few times. Just overall, not my day.
Now, I'm new. But tonight I gave my very first bath. My cherry has been popped. I'll get to that in a moment. However, first, I have some sad news to report.
I've been working at the Nursing Home for less then a week, and already I've seen one paitent die. It's really very sad. Holly (note: for privacy, all paitents names are changed) was your sterotypical cranky, complaining, crotchety old lady, but she had a nice heart and a full candy dish. Everyone loved her. She was bedridden, and she had MS. She was more or less paralyzed from the breast-bone area down, and had a slew of medical problems. She had to have nearly everything done for her - eating, dressing, taking her meds, and going to the bathroom. I only met her twice, but I am told she'd been at the Nursing Home for nearly five years, and everyone loved her. She had a stroke in the middle of the night last night, and the nurse who found her was her friend. Holly will be missed.
Now then, back to the baths. Up until now, I've been observing and taking notes on everyone's routine. Every resident we have has different needs, different physical and/or mental limitations, requires different amounts of assistance at their baths. Some of them only need to be reminded "It's bathtime", some of them need to be lifted from their chairs and completely bathed, we even have a couple that refuse to bathe at all and only get sponge baths.
WARNING the following discusses medical procedures and is not for the faint of stomach. You've been warned.
The first paitient of the night is Mr. Colostomy, James. James is mostly able to undress himself, tend to his colostomy bag, and bathe himself, but his hands tremble, and he requires some assistance. Now, for those of you who dont know, a colostomy is a medical procure in which part of the intestine is removed (usually due to cancer, or ulcer), and the intestine is routed through the abdominal wall, bypassing the anus, and feces are collected in a bag that hangs outside the abdomen. Because the last part of the intestine is concerned with absorbing water, the feces in the bag are often quite loose and even diarrhea-like. The bag smells. It doesn't quite smell like normal feces...but...sharper. Thats the only way I can describe it. Often, bits of dried feces collect around the incision. Now, since the anus is not involved with defecation, the paitent has no control over when a poo will worm its way out of the intestine.
James is a very nice man, despite his physical limitations. He was my very first bath and I shall always look on him with fondness in my eye...much like I remember the man who took my virginity.
He smelled too, except he didn't have a colostomy bag.
Now, I'm new. But tonight I gave my very first bath. My cherry has been popped. I'll get to that in a moment. However, first, I have some sad news to report.
I've been working at the Nursing Home for less then a week, and already I've seen one paitent die. It's really very sad. Holly (note: for privacy, all paitents names are changed) was your sterotypical cranky, complaining, crotchety old lady, but she had a nice heart and a full candy dish. Everyone loved her. She was bedridden, and she had MS. She was more or less paralyzed from the breast-bone area down, and had a slew of medical problems. She had to have nearly everything done for her - eating, dressing, taking her meds, and going to the bathroom. I only met her twice, but I am told she'd been at the Nursing Home for nearly five years, and everyone loved her. She had a stroke in the middle of the night last night, and the nurse who found her was her friend. Holly will be missed.
Now then, back to the baths. Up until now, I've been observing and taking notes on everyone's routine. Every resident we have has different needs, different physical and/or mental limitations, requires different amounts of assistance at their baths. Some of them only need to be reminded "It's bathtime", some of them need to be lifted from their chairs and completely bathed, we even have a couple that refuse to bathe at all and only get sponge baths.
WARNING the following discusses medical procedures and is not for the faint of stomach. You've been warned.
The first paitient of the night is Mr. Colostomy, James. James is mostly able to undress himself, tend to his colostomy bag, and bathe himself, but his hands tremble, and he requires some assistance. Now, for those of you who dont know, a colostomy is a medical procure in which part of the intestine is removed (usually due to cancer, or ulcer), and the intestine is routed through the abdominal wall, bypassing the anus, and feces are collected in a bag that hangs outside the abdomen. Because the last part of the intestine is concerned with absorbing water, the feces in the bag are often quite loose and even diarrhea-like. The bag smells. It doesn't quite smell like normal feces...but...sharper. Thats the only way I can describe it. Often, bits of dried feces collect around the incision. Now, since the anus is not involved with defecation, the paitent has no control over when a poo will worm its way out of the intestine.
James is a very nice man, despite his physical limitations. He was my very first bath and I shall always look on him with fondness in my eye...much like I remember the man who took my virginity.
He smelled too, except he didn't have a colostomy bag.
posted by Night Shift Nurse at 8:52 PM
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